You might be wondering why your sex drive spontaneously picks up at certain moments in the day, even though there wasn’t anything particularly arousing around you. Sometimes we’re unaware of the little things that get us turned on, but no matter the reason, they can get us frisky, thinking, “Need sex now.”
Still, what might these strange stimulators be? A few sex and relationship experts share tips on things that can make you especially excited and ready to go.
1. Peekaboo Clothing
You know those crotchless panties that leave a little less to the imagination? Well, they can make you feel sexier and please your partner. “Peekaboo lingerie makes people especially horny. Open cup bras and crotchless lingerie is highly seductive,” Jaclinne Cheng, founder and CEO of Spicy Lingerie, said to POPSUGAR.
Why? “Open cups and open crotch make for easy access. The skimpy and revealing nature of these items will heighten anticipation because your lover won’t be able to resist you, and this makes both the wearer and the viewer especially horny,” she explained.
What’s more, don a deep red. “As far as colors go, multiple studies have shown that the color red is associated with arousal the most when it comes to men and women,” she added. (Try this: Lace Heart Crotchless Panty ($10).)
Sounds strange, but it’s actually pretty common. Grief and libido have this very close connection. (Just think of WeddingCrashers, right?) “Often during times of grief, the grief-stricken person is in a psychological position to lean on others for support. This support and reassurance very often develops into something more sexual,” dating specialist Alex Reddle told POPSUGAR.
Why? “Sexual arousal positioning in the brain is interestingly close to part of your brain where fear, panic, and grief are all triggered, making it very easy for you to move from one to another,” he explained.
3. An Arousing Argument
If you find yourself in a heated argument, you might be getting hot in other places, too. “Yes, this may not be the traditional way to get you and your partner horny and into bed, but it’s called makeup sex for a reason,” Reddle said. “An argument increases testosterone, blood pressure, and alertness. Similar to fear and panic, your temperature goes sky high, your palms sweat, and your skin tingles with every sensation.” (Sounds pretty similar to something else, here.)
“Whether it’s the relief that the fight is over, or a release of all this built-up tension, makeup sex can very often follow suit,” he said.
Just like sweets can trigger the idea of a reward, so does sex. And eating sweets can certainly get you in the mood. “Junk food can certainly give you the feel-good factor and can get us tingling in all the right places. Certain types of junk food, such as ice cream and chocolate, can help release the feel-good chemicals in our body and get our endorphins flowing,” he said.
What’s more, playing with food during sex can also get you extra horny, like strawberries, whipped cream, or chocolate, he added. (Try this: Shunga Deluxe Edible Body Paint in chocolate flavor ($15).)
5. Scary Movies
Your SO might have a motive for picking a scary flick for date night. Being scared can also be a turn-on, says sex and relationship expert Megan Stubbs, EdD, ACS. As your body adrenaline ramps up, so can your feelings for your significant other. “This correlation comes from an infamous bridge study where participants rated women they met on a shaky bridge more attractive than on solid ground. You body will think your partner is making your heart race, rather than that spooky chainsaw clown,” she said. Just in time for Halloween, head to a haunted house with your partner. The screams will follow into the bedroom.
6. Seeing Others in Action
This applies to people . . . but also even animals. “Perhaps you’re at the zoo and you happen to stumble upon some chimpanzees mating. Monkey see, monkey do, right? While you obviously don’t want to have sex with the animals, seeing them in the act can make your mind stray to your own partner and the sex you could be having,” Stubbs said.
What’s more, “this is also one of the reported benefits from people who enjoy going to sex clubs or swinging parties. Seeing is believing, so it’s no surprise that any sort of visual stimuli can have you thinking about having your own private show with your partner,” she added.