1. Be Honest with Yourself
You are human. You have feelings. It’s okay to like someone. If you feel something and have considered dating your friend’s ex, just accept the fact that the feeling is there. Hiding from yourself is just like trying to play hide and seek by yourself. You can run, but you can’t really hide, can you?
2. Evaluate Your Friendship
Just how close are the two of you? Is this love venture really worth the risk? Love is infatuating and amazing. Just remember that when it isn’t, your gal pals are always the ones to hand you the Kleenex. So think long and hard about how much you’d like to risk this friendship for the sake of a guy.
3. Make a Decision
At some point, you have really thought things through. Now you just have to step in a direction. You can remain good friends with both people. You can start something new and refreshing with your friend’s ex. Either way, you should make your decision in a timely manner. Don’t wait too long, or you may miss the boat!
4. Talk to the Guy/Ex/Future Lover
He is at the center of this, and he might not even know it. Make sure you communicate how you feel. There’s no need to get goose bumps and butterflies all on your own. Just talk to him and see what’s up. If he’s interested too, then it may be time to move forward.
5. Open up to Your Friend
She is your friend. You should have some regard for her and her well-being. There’s no need to sneak around. Just be honest with her. If she’s your friend, she doesn’t have to agree with your decision, but at some point she should be open to at least a conversation.
6. Don’t Feel the Need to Explain
There are only two of you in the relationship, you and your partner (and this is no crime). Stop feeling guilty about something that should make you happy. What’s done is done. The past can’t be erased or changed, so move forward with your new relationship.
7. Don’t Brag
It is one thing to share about your love, and another to brag about it. The first will make your friend support your new relationship, while the latter might make them throw rotten tomatoes your way. The connection you two have doesn’t need a megaphone.
8. Don’t Compare Notes
It may be tempting to ask your friend for advice about your new love, or to compare her experience with yours, but don’t. Chances are, the experience and issues are completely different, and all you’ll get for your trouble are bad feelings, including a little jealousy.